Dreams are dashed, and schemes have come to nothing. The best laid plans of mice and men... are about equal. And as I ponder and reflect on what could have been, and what could have been done differently... I am tempted to regret.
Like many others I sing Paul Anka's words,
"Regrets, I've had a few
But then again, too few to mention
I did what I had to do and saw it through without exemption
I planned each charted course, each careful step along the byway
And more, much more than this, I did it my way."
I live life with a determination not to regret, but now, as often, I struggle in trying circumstances. I do not regret Zambia; I do not regret getting to know John. I lament his untimely passing, dreams unfulfilled, schemes unrealized. I wish I did not feel there was something more effective I could have done. I wanted... I want a better ending.
But for now I leave the closing thoughts to Joni Mitchell:
"Tears and fears and feeling proud
To say "I love you" right out loud
Dreams and schemes and circus crowds
I've looked at life that way
But now old friends are acting strange
They shake their heads, they say I've changed
Well something's lost but something's gained
In living every day
I've looked at life from both sides now
From WIN and LOSE and still somehow
It's life's illusions I recall
I really don't know life at all
I've looked at life from both sides now
From up and down and still somehow
It's life's illusions I recall
I really don't know life at all."
Like many others I sing Paul Anka's words,
"Regrets, I've had a few
But then again, too few to mention
I did what I had to do and saw it through without exemption
I planned each charted course, each careful step along the byway
And more, much more than this, I did it my way."
I live life with a determination not to regret, but now, as often, I struggle in trying circumstances. I do not regret Zambia; I do not regret getting to know John. I lament his untimely passing, dreams unfulfilled, schemes unrealized. I wish I did not feel there was something more effective I could have done. I wanted... I want a better ending.
But for now I leave the closing thoughts to Joni Mitchell:
"Tears and fears and feeling proud
To say "I love you" right out loud
Dreams and schemes and circus crowds
I've looked at life that way
But now old friends are acting strange
They shake their heads, they say I've changed
Well something's lost but something's gained
In living every day
I've looked at life from both sides now
From WIN and LOSE and still somehow
It's life's illusions I recall
I really don't know life at all
I've looked at life from both sides now
From up and down and still somehow
It's life's illusions I recall
I really don't know life at all."
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